


Cellophane

by Cyberrr



Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Cute Ending, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Kai is the mama, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Male Pregnancy, Ni-Ki is the son lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:48:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27668441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cyberrr/pseuds/Cyberrr
Summary: Soobin has a late-night call with Kai, just to check up on his husband, but the night continues on with a reminiscence of what their family is to them, and some extreme longing of wanting to be reunited with one another once again, with their son Nishi in the middle.
Relationships: Choi Soobin & Huening Kai, Choi Soobin/Huening Kai
Comments: 2
Kudos: 36





	Cellophane

**Author's Note:**

> This has mentions of Kai being pregnant, so if that makes you uncomfortable, then this might not suit you. In this universe, men can get pregnant. ( Not A/B/O ) and I don't feel the need to explain how this is so since I got inspo off of Hosik's story ( A Manhwa ) which you should really check out because it's so cute ;;;;

Soobin stared blankly into the red alarm clock right across the room, propped up against an old mahogany dresser. Kai had chosen the piece, claiming it would have made the home more lively. Give their white walls and their cold floors, colors that embodied human warmth. 

That wasn’t true Soobin thought bitterly, sinking into the comforters of his bed. 

2:00 AM the clock had blinked, on and off, on and off.

Another autumn night, the other half of the king-sized bed empty and longing.

How autumn nights began to be over time, and how Soobin had begun to expect them to end. 

Above his head, his phone laid, connected to a charger that followed behind the headboard of his mono-IKEA crafted bed frame. The screen lit showing the reminiscences of an ongoing call, already twenty minutes in.

“ When are you coming home darling? “ Soobin whispered, unsure if his voice had reached the speaker.

He hadn’t meant for it to sound so sad, so lonely, but he was always terrible at keeping his emotions at bay, especially when it concerned Kai. 

  
  


His voice came out low and raspy, quiet enough to be sure that the sleeping body, curled up and against his stomach wouldn’t be awoken by the noise. Soobin smiled sadly, his mind drifting to if’s and buts. 

_ What if Kai couldn’t come home till much later? What if Kai didn’t want to come home?  _

They were foolish and unconventional thoughts, but Soobin was a melancholic and thrived off the despair of the unknown. It must be some sort of syndrome, to be so in love that you desperately depend on your partner's constant presence to live. Or maybe it was just his Soobin and his constant infatuation with the ever-loving Kai Kamal Huening. 

Static shuffling came from the other side of the screen, evidence that the other was still awake. Soobin wondered if the boy was drifting off before he had bothered to awaken him. It must have already been 5:00 AM for him, Soobin thought, glancing back towards the clock.

2:03 AM

His husband would have to wake up for work soon. He knew that and even protested against their nightly call earlier before, already knowing that the younger would stay up for him no matter how tired he had been from the day's labor. His husband refused, as expected, ignoring Soobin’s persuasion by rambling about his latest project. 

And that was how Kai was. 

Willing to give so much.

Soobin would do the same, but in the midst of his days at home, playing, taking care of Nishi, he had begun to feel useless. Like he really doesn't give as much as Kai does, and he had been falling behind, taking and taking all the hard work and love Kai had to offer. 

As most did, days became calmer and autumn approached the father and son kindly, enticing them with colorful leaves and the promise of seasonal pastries. Like Cinnamonbuns, and pumpkin spices coffees. Soobin had experienced something new over the past few years about his son. A common occurrence of Nishi turning in for nights at earlier times, and sleeping through long movies or quiet activities had become a sudden trend in their tiny household. 

This left Soobin to relish in the silence of the apartment. A cold yet serene quiet, with TV noises buzzing and laundry washers spinning to accompany him. It was days like these where he missed Kai the most. Missed how he bumbled around the living room and kitchen and danced with Nishi in his arms as he rushed Soobin to make meals and snacks faster. Or the nights where Kai would take warm baths, leaning onto Soobin's chest because he claimed autumn made the house too cold for them to exit so soon, even though Soobin could tell that their fingers were beginning to prune. Days were too slow in autumn. Too short mornings but too long of nights.

And he missed Kai. 

He missed cold mornings where Kai would stick his hands under Soobin’s shirt, and he missed the warm kisses that resulted in even warmer hugs. He missed giggling as the couple pulled each other out of bed, practically melted into one another as they moved to receive the missing part to their pile, their rambunctious little boy. 

Nowadays, though he’d never admit it to Kai, ‘their’ son had transformed into 'Soobin's’ son. 

  
  


“ Soobin. “ A cracky voice interrupted, causing him to blink away the drowsiness that stung the corners of his eyes. 

He draped an arm around the 10 year old’s waist, pulling him in closer before he answered. 

  
  


“ Yes, honey? “ 

There was a long pause on the other end. For a moment, Soobin had thought Kai had fallen asleep on the other end of the line, and though he was curious, he would never hold it against the other. 

Because Kai was probably struggling too. A lot more than he was. 

“ I miss you. “ a weak voice whispered into the mic.

Soobin’s heart stuttered at the simple words, the world around him hollowing, for it was simply no longer there. 

  
  


Kai had a way of making simple words sentimental. Words that strummed his heart like a lyre in an empty cave, echoing each note into an abyss that swallowed them greedily. It was quite obvious that Kai was the instrument whilst Soobin was the void.

“ I miss you too. “ Soobin murmured, “ I miss you so much it hurts. Nishi misses you as well. He always asks when mom is coming home. “ Soobin added, glancing down at the little boy and running his fingers through his ravenette hair. 

He had Soobin’s straight black hair, an Asian feature he had hoped wouldn’t have been passed down, but genetics were unforgiving. He had cursed himself as Nishi had grown, for giving the boy such strict hair genes, but Kai had cooed instead, praising that he would be so handsome with the black locks. Soobin smiled to himself, thinking about a conversation they had long ago about it, around when Nishi was three years old. 

  
  
  


_ Soobin had been laying on the couch, Nishi in his lap, as he watched cable aimlessly, flipping through the different baking channels they had to offer. Kai had entered the living room, slipping right beside Soobin and grabbing his arm to tuck it behind his head. He responded by wrapping it around his shoulders, tugging him closer. Kai had smelt like lemon dish soap, clean from doing the dishes after a nice lunch of spring rolls and lemonade. _

_ Soobin had interrupted their silence with a small comment, something he hadn’t thought much about, more like a slip of the tongue.  _

_ ‘ I’m sorry about Nishi’s hair. ‘ He had said, threading his fingers through the locks that jetted straight down.  _

_ Kai had let a confused whimper, turning his head towards him in question.  _

_ ‘ What do you have to be sorry about? ‘ Kai asked, laying his head on the other's shoulder.  _

_ He had shrugged back, not expecting to have to expand on that.  _

_ Soobin frowned, glancing down at the mop of hair on the tiny toddler's head. “ I gave our son such ugly black hair. I can only be grateful that he has your pretty eyes, and my nose bridge. “  _

_ Kai had frowned as well, pinching Soobin’s ear until the older had let out a surrendering whine.  _

_ ‘ Your hair and Nishi’s hair are both really beautiful. I mean sure you’d still look good in any hair color and style, even bald, but your black hair is what makes you look so enticing, honey. ‘ Kai supplied, kissing the side of Soobin’s shoulder, one, two, five times.  _

_ Soobin stared off into the television screen, a lot more in love with his sweet, kind husband, than he was the day before.  _

_ Ever since then, Soobin couldn’t help but to fall in love with the ball of hair atop his son's head, as he could never hate something Kai loved.  _

  
  


Kai replied with a shuddering breath, his voice frail as it traveled over the speaker once more.

“ I know. I'm sorry. I want to come home. “

Soobin frowned, shaking his head. 

“ No, no baby don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault my love. We want you home too, but we understand why you’re gone. “ Soobin said, closing his eyes slowly. The back of his throat began to burn as he finished, a small lump bobbing its way up into his adam's apple. 

He missed Kai, but some things in life were necessary and to be an adult, it took a bit of sacrifice. 

Kai loved his work as a marine biologist. He knew that, along with countless other things about him. If there was one thing Soobin could promise to Kai, it would be never to hold him back. As much as Soobin pained and longed for Kai’s presence at home, he was quite proud of his husband's accomplishments. Kai was smart and dedicated. He had studied and trained hard for his career. He was so unlike Soobin, but that’s what he liked most about Kai. unlike him, Kai had spent four years in university, and one year in residency to get into the position he was in now. A novel scientist amongst a hoard of others who could easily replace him, yet Kai never lost track of himself or his goal. Kai was the type of person who knew his limits, and it used it to his advantage, pushing himself as much as he could. 

But Soobin wasn’t like that. He had spent those five years of knowing Kai Kamal Huening, jumping from career to career, baking, teaching, retail, waitressing, anything that kept him on his feet. But there wasn’t a goal or a pattern to his job-hopping because Soobin was just living. And Kai accepted that. Kai understood, and loved, and encouraged the mess Soobin had been all throughout and after University. And when Soobin finally figured out that his place in life was meant in the home, Kai had congratulated him. 

Kai was ok with the idea of him staying home even though Kai was the mother, and Soobin was grateful. He had feared the oncoming responsibilities of becoming the breadwinner of the family, But Kai had confidently dismissed the idea, holding Soobin in his arms as he led their conversations on what'd he do once he was able to return back to work. 

Kai’s rambles of his aspirations and his studies had calmed Soobin of his work ridden anxiety, as he was assured that Kai cherished work more than he ever could and that he wanted the responsibility instead. And Soobin was ever so grateful for that, but the cost of the arrangement was unavoidable.

He had felt guilty for that most of all. 

As colder weather came around, brushing in through the gaps of the front door, so had bitter thoughts. He had wondered countless times during his morning coffee that maybe if he had taken up a career, worked hard for once in his life, he could have made life better for Kai. Kai wouldn’t have to have worked so much. Kai could be back home with Nishi. Their lovely angel baby boy. 

If someone were to ask, Soobin could confidently say that Kai loved Nishi more than he loved himself. 

He had told Kai about how inadequate he had felt. A vulnerable time that suddenly appeared after he had begun crying when Nishi had announced that he wanted to work at home like daddy. Soobin grimaced as he looked over the colorful drawing of what were two stick figures in a house, supposedly him and Nishi as one of the characters had blue hair. 

He had asked Nishi right after if he wanted to be anything else, something much more engaging and useful than what daddy was, but Nishi had shaken his head no, stating he enjoyed staying at home with him. 

Soobin, with his mind a tangled brush of vines and misconceptions, had somehow spun the toddler's words into claims that he was a lazy man, whose only contribution to the world was staying at home and watching his child. And Soobin eagerly agreed. This was quick to dump Soobin into a depressing mess of insecurity and fragileness. 

When Kai came home that afternoon, he was greeted with a bundled up Soobin, hidden in the duvets of his sheet with Nishi tucked against his chest. Kai uncovered the sheets, discovering Soobin’s tear-stained cheeks, and swollen eyes, and had forced the truth out of him, 

Kai was quick to convince Soobin that being a parent was just as hard as working a career. At first, it was hard to believe, as caring for Nishi came quite simply to him, but Kai pressed that he often worried that Soobin would burn out sooner or later with how hard he worked.

  
  


Kai also added that even if Soobin did get a job, Kai would still continue to be a workaholic. He murmured in a grateful voice that it might have made it difficult to indulge himself into his practice if Soobin had chosen to work, for they’d have no one to take care of their little boy. That warmed Soobin’s heart, but not enough to wish that the other could be home, little spooned into him as he wrapped his long arms over both Kai and Nishi.

  
  
  


“ I know, I just can’t help be guilty. Nishi barely sees his mom. I’d be surprised if he even remembers me as a part of his life. “ Kai laughed sadly, “ I miss the both of you so much. Autumn is so lonely without you. “ Soft hiccups began to echo into the phone's receiver, coming out muffled.

  
  


Sometimes he forgets that Kai, as strong as he can be, is a parent just like him. Sad, alone, and insecure. He wished he could take that pain from him, and transfer it onto himself. Even if he had to feel it tens fold. 

  
  


Soobin blinked away silent tears as he listened to the quiet sobs, sniffing heavily before he began making kissing sounds in the speaker. 

The sobs and hiccups momentarily stopped, causing Soobin to begin smacking the phone microphone with his lips as best as he possibly could considering he had a grown child in his embrace and he was lying down. 

Kai had suddenly begun to laugh, returning the noises of endearment with his own noisy kisses. 

And that was enough for Soobin.

  
  


Enough to know that even beyond the distance, the two loved each other like doves on a branch during a gentle snow flurry, nestled into one another, peaceful and joyed. 

  
  


" What are you even doing- " Kai giggled.

“ You’re the best mom anyone could have “ Soobin interrupted, sucking in a heavy breath and wiping the tears that had bundled onto his bottom lashes, into the side of his pillow. 

“ You’re such a good parent Kai. You sacrifice so much for your family. More than your mom could have ever done for you. Our baby boy is so happy and healthy. Baby did you hear that? “ Soobin whispers, beginning to sniffle again. 

Kai lets out a broken ‘mmhmm’ his voice trembling.

“ Our baby is happy and healthy. He does well in school and he draws you a lot did you know that? When you come home you’ll see that our fridge has been taken over with pictures of you. I’ve resorted to writing the grocery list on the coffee maker! “ Kai responds with another tiny giggle, breathy and clear. He can only imagine that Kai has his phone tucked against the cheeks, his fingers fiddling with something, anything, because that’s what Kai does. 

“ baby he loves you so much. And I do too '' Soobin chokes out, petting the top of Nishi’s hair. 

“ I love you “ 

“ I love you too. “  __

“ Can I drop everything and just come home to you? “ Kai offers. 

Soobin blinks, pondering the question. “ Would you be happy with that? “ 

“ Yes. “ Kai replies immediately. 

Soobin stalls for a moment longer. 

“ Wouldn’t Chris be mad? “ 

“ Chan Hyung? “ Kai asks. 

“ Yea. I don’t want you to get in trouble darling. “

“ He has a child of his own. He has to understand. “ Kai adds, trailing off. 

Soobin chuckles, twisting a few strands of Nishi’s hair between his index finger. He kicks the boy's leg so he can intertwine theirs together, saving the warmth they had radiated together. 

“ Since when did Hyung have a child like that? “ Soobin asks, genuinely curious. 

“ People lead private lives all the time. It might’ve been around a year ago. It’s a boy. Remember when we forgot to tell Beomgyu Hyung I was pregnant? “ 

Soobin stifled a laugh, digging his face into the pillow. 

He had remembered that.

The new couple had been so busy with preparing the new apartment and settling in with their new jobs, Kai at the time an intern for Big Hit, a science firm, while Soobin had recently been promoted as manager of a local bakery, right down the street from the lab.

They had gone to the hospital together for a daily check-up somewhere in the week, as Kai had complained about being sick with the flu and Soobin needing a new vaccine to keep up with the required health requisitions. It was then that they discovered Kai had been 4 weeks pregnant, the doctor pulling him aside to perform an ultra scan on Kai after he had grown suspicious of Kai's listed symptoms. He remembers the exact moment Kai had come barreling out of the doctor's office and into Soobin’s arms, crying hysterically as he clawed the poor boy's arm, dragging him back into the room. 

Soobin had almost gone mad that day, afraid Kai had terrible news that they would have to face.

Fortunately, it was nothing of the sort. The Doctor had struggled to get Kai calm enough to sit down, and the younger only complied to do so after Soobin had scooped him into his arms. Once they were finally sat in one of the doctor's many available chairs, with a sniffling Kai in his lap, the man began to break it down for the older. Apparently, Kai had been three weeks pregnant without either of them noticing. Soobin had blamed the early morning vomiting on stress from moving and the internship while Kai had excused his sensitivity to the shift of weather, completely unaware of the possibility that Kai could have been pregnant. The couple had never thought of the pregnancy as a bad thing, but they could admit that it wasn't the most ideal of timing.

It was a wreck the following week; full of anxiousness and despair, but the ice had broken once Kai had told his parents. They were accepting of the situation and Kai’s older sister Lea offered her help to the expecting couple. She had taken the earliest train to Busan, helping with the unpacking of the leftover furniture and the newborn checklist that she had magically conjured up the journey there. Before the couple knew it, their apartment was stacked high with boxes of diapers and piles of clothing. She had even ordered a pastel blue walker after four days of her stay, which Kai begged Lea to ignore but somehow ended up in the corner of their living room. 

As incompetent and useless as he felt at the time, Soobin was grateful that Lea helped out after all. Being a parent wasn’t exactly an easy skill to learn. But they learned things together. They worked together, loved Nishi together, and lived in harmony together. And that's what family was about. 

“ Are you sure you want to come home? “ 

Kai scoffed, “ Why wouldn’t I be? “ 

“ Or do you just want to come home because you're guilty that you are not around enough for Nishi? Because I can assure you, Nishi is not going to grow up to be some serial killer because of some mommy issues when he has a perfectly good mommy right here. “ 

The line went dead silent before he heard a defeated sigh. 

“ Aren’t they the same thing? Do I need to have a reason other than that? “ Kai whispered.

Soobin sighed as well, rubbing his temple with the hand that wasn’t tucked under Nishi. 

“ Kai. When I decided to marry you, I promised myself one thing. “ 

“ To never cheat on me? “ 

“ What?! Of course, why is that even a question!? No that's not what I meant “ Soobin scolded, rolling his eyes at the onslaught of laughter that followed. 

“ I promised that I would support you in everything you did. That I’d do my best to make you happy. “

“ Soobin but I’m happy with you! “ 

“ But you are happy with work too! It makes you so incredibly happy Kai and I’ve seen it! You love animals, you love your work, and you love your family, and I know it's not fair that you have to choose between us, but I would want you to choose your work. “ 

The line was silent again, and Soobin glanced at the digital clock. 

3:46 AM. Kai had work in twenty minutes. 

“ I hate that you’re always right. “ Kai whispered. The other yawned into the mic, letting Soobin realize just how tired he really was. 

“ Darling, you should sleep. “ 

Kai scoffed, rustling the sheets around him. “ It’s about time I get ready for work. I’m going to be dead tired today. “    
  


“ I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have kept you up. “

“ It’s ok, I wanted to talk to you. I don’t regret it at all. “ 

Kai glances out his window, the sun peeking in through the windows, setting an orangey-yellow haze onto him. 

  
  


Another Autumn morning.

  
  


“ I’ll come home soon. " Kai pouted, " Goodnight Soobin. “ 

“ Goodnight Kai. “ 

Before Soobin could tap on the end button, Kai had whispered another thing, 

“ I love you, Nishi, I’ll be home soon. “ 

And with that, the call closed, dimming his phone and bringing it to a black screen. Soobin dropped his head back into his pillow, his arms draped over and under Nishi as he lay still in his embrace. 

Soobin’s eyes began to droop close, falling into nasally snores and a peaceful silence. Kai would be home soon. He could wait for that, whether it took an eternity or two.

**Author's Note:**

> follow me on twitter at Cybrerr and leave a kudo/comment if you liked at all?? lol idk why I wrote about autumn during winter but o well, not my problem :}


End file.
